You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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