Pregnant stripper...not hot.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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