Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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