32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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