I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
