forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Randomize
