OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Quick, to the slutcave!
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Randomize
