You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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