Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
