um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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