I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
