i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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