Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Randomize
