in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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