Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
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