Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
