I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
