Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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