i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
