Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
