Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
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