once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
