So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
