He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
bring money and cleavage
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
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