Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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