Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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