There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize