Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
