I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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