Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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