I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
