so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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