Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
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This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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