So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
