I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize
