just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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