My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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