windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
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i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
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I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
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