the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize