I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take back everything I said about communal showers
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize