it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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