Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
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