Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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