Having a random hookup so left but love u
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
