in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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