Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
