So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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