My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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