so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
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