she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
