yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize