just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I AM VODKA MAN
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
